Should I be upset if my son does not want to include his parents in the rehearsal for his wedding?

My daughter is the flower girl in the wedding, but he states he doesn't think I should be at the rehersal. I've also been told I'll be sitting with the other guest and not with family. I am the groom's mother. Up until last month, he lived with me all of his life. Am I wrong in being upset????

Should I be upset if my son does not want to include his parents in the rehearsal for his wedding?
NO U HAVE EVERY RIGHT TO BE UPSET.... I THINK IF MY HUSBAND WAS TO TELL HIS MOTHER OR MY MOTHER OR FAMILY THAT THEY COULDN'T BE AT REHEARSAL HIS MOTHER OR MY MOTHER WOULD PUT A STOP TO THE WEDDING ONLY BC US ARAB'S DON'T BELIEVE IN NOT HAVING THE FAMILY AT REHEARSAL..... MAYBE OTHERS MIGHT THINK IT'S NOT A BIG DEAL BUT I THINK IT IS AND THAT IS VERY VERY DISRESPECTFUL TO TELL UR MOTHER U DON'T WANT HER TO BE INCLUDED AT THE REHEARSAL AND FOR YOU TO HAVE TO SIT WITH GUEST AND NOT FAMILY BUT UR FOOT DOWN AND TELL HIM UR GOING TO BE THERE WEATHER HE LIKES IT OR NOT.......
Reply:WOAH! What's up with that?

Make sure no $$$ goes his way then.



"A daughter is a daughter for life. A son is a son till he takes a wife"
Reply:No u have a right to be upset because he is part of ur family.
Reply:Sure you can be UPSET, but what good would that do?



To me, a rehearsal is for those who are IN the wedding. Bride, groom, bridesmaids, groomsmen, MOH, Best man, flower girl, ring bearer, and whoever is walking the bride up the aisle.



I too think there are other issues that are not being told. We would have to hear the bride and grooms side to shed some more light for a better opinion.



So the flower girl is his sister or step sister?



Something tells me that there was an ugly divorce and the ugly part was on YOUR side, which is why you aren't invited to the rehearsal and not allowed to sit with the family.
Reply:what is his reason's? how was your relationship? do you like his bride to be? all these could be reasons he doesn't want you there as anything more than a guest. if you are in disagreement with the wedding for what ever reason then it would be hypocritical for you to be a part of it. you need to give more info for a more accurate response to your question.
Reply:You have every right to be upset because that is very mean on his part!!!! Unless there's something that he wants to be a suprise!!!!!!
Reply:Wow. Well, parents wouldn't normally be at a rehearsal, but with your daughter being flower girl, you should be, so you can look after things for her.

And the MOG should be escorted especially into the church to be seated with her immediate family. Then, at the reception, often parents are at the head table. If not there, then with immediate family at a table closest to the head table.

Something's up here, mom. Talk to him....
Reply:This can be hard to hear, have you ever asked him why he does what you there? This time can be really stressful, i just got married 2 weeks ago and the rehersal is stressful and all of that, and maybe he just feels that if you are there you will try to run it and that isnt what he wants. Just ask him why he doesnt want you there and work it out that way, maybe he will let you still come to the rehersal dinner, or whatever, and its not like they are keeping you out of their day or else you wouldnt even know about it. Just take a deep breath and sit your son down and ask him NICELY why you cant be there JUST to watch!
Reply:its just a rehearsal! im sure hell invite u to the real thing!
Reply:Yeah, I would. I'd ask that little punk what's up his butt and why he's dissing his own blood. Maybe you didn't beat him enough. (kidding, of course)



If your daughter is going to be at the wedding, as her mother, you are responsible for her and should be there to supervise. I can understand you feeling left out. Sorry to hear about it. Hope all works out ok.
Reply:yes but I think there are more issue here than you have stated. If not I really think that sucks, and for you to talk about it with him and try to get past this.
Reply:There's definitely something wrong in this picture. Seeing as your daughter is the flower girl, and you are his Mother, why aren't you allowed to sit with the family during the ceremony/reception? Do you think that his wife-to-be doesn't want you involved for whatever reason? Have you had any big arguments or fights with your son? It would be most unfortunate to let a squabble come in between having a beautiful ceremony. Try to sit down and have a talk with your son, and explain to him how much it would mean for you to be with the family, etc. This is his big day, and you want to support him and be there for him! Honestly other than the fact that maybe your son is upset with you for whatever reason (you have to find this out yourself) - the only other thing I can think of is that maybe your future daughter-in-law is a b**** and just doesn't want you in the picture. Either way, please have a talk with your son. It's the only way to know what's going on.. we Yahoo answerers can only give our input.. Best of luck to you!
Reply:No your not wrong for being upset. He is not respecting his Mother. It is however his day and you should take the high road and respect his wishes. I'm guessing there is more to this story than you are telling but based on what I know it sounds like he needs a good old fashioned trip to the woodshed.
Reply:It seems to me that you didn't pay for the rehearsal dinner. Am I right?



Let me guess.... you are divorced and they don't want a scene confronting your ex-husband?
Reply:From what you've said, I can see how it would be very upsetting...but we don't know the history here or how well y'all get along so there's likely more to it than what's been posted.
Reply:Honestly yes you should be upset, it is your sons wedding! Why on earth would he not invite you?? All family and traveling guests should beinvited. I think parents are the most important people, other than bridal party! I would ask him why you are not invited and demand that he treat you like his mother!
Reply:I would be pissed...... your suppose to be invited to the rehearsal and you should be seated appropriately at the wedding... I am sitting my mother with her friends because that's where she wants to be.
Reply:NO NO NO You are not wrong for being upset. The groom's parents are always at the rehearsal. Do you mean at the wedding you will be sitting with the other guests? If that is true that is totally wrong.



Can you talk to talk to him and find out if all of this was his idea or is others have put the idea in his head (such as his future in-laws or his fiance)?



I am so sorry you are going through this. This should be such a happy time. I personally would not feel like going to the wedding. I am not a mother but I know that mothers make all sorts of sacrifices for their children. So I would think you would just go to the wedding and act pleasant no matter how hurt you are. By doing that it will pay off later. He will know that you were there for him no matter what.



God bless you.
Reply:From the info you've given this sounds very strange...and yes, I think you have the right to be upset. Is there some other conflict going on in the family that has caused this?
Reply:I'd be very upset and offended.
Reply:NOOOPE!!!!!!!
Reply:There's obviously a reason, perhaps you practice embarrassing behaviour. Maybe you were/are mean to him. Sounds like you're the problem, mom. Take a subjective view, and see if there's anything you've done to cause this.
Reply:trust me. you will enjoy the wedding more if your not in it. just enjoy the people, the atmosphere. the behind the scenes activities are so stressful.
Reply:Not invited to the rehersal???? I can understand not doing the whole parent thing at the wedding, especially if one side does not have a close relationship with the parents, then unfortunatly the other parents get shafted. But to not be invited to the rehersal dinner. That seems almost shady. Especially when traditionally the grooms parents pay for the dinner.....oh and I hope you are not paying for it if you are not invited!!! That would be a slap. I did not do the parent thing at my wedding because my dad had passed and my relationship with my mom is sour, but she was at least invited to the wedding and did get to sit with the family. That just seems weird...what is your relationship with the daughter in law to be...maybe there is something there causing drama???
Reply:there is defentily more to the story. is he unstable? was you a ***** to him your whole life? was this decision influenced by the bride? is he on drugs? there are a lot of questions that need to be asked and answered first.
Reply:No. You should be upset. No matter how bad you embarrass him, You are his mother. he should be ashamed of himself to do something like this. I wouldn't even go to his wedding if he tried to pull that on me.
Reply:no you should be upset and go there and sit with family because from that wedding on you will be family.Not a guest
Reply:Sounds like there is underlying issue between you and him or between you and his new bride. You should sit down with him and talk it over.
Reply:You have every right to be upset. What is his problem? Have you talked to him about it? Traditionally the groom's parents pay for the rehearsal dinner and have always been included. Are the bride's parents invited? At most wedding receptions the parents of the bride and groom are seated at a table near the bridal party table and if room permits they are sometimes even seated at the bridal table. I think you should talk to him and find out what is going on and let him know how hurt you are by these decisions.
Reply:There is obviously something else you are not telling us.